Thursday, October 2, 2008

Uterscrub: Because you already have plans Friday night

Funny thing happened this morning: I put on pants that go all the way down to my feet. Crazy. It was 47 degrees outside when I got up, so I'm glad I closed the windows last night. Last time I wore long pants was the 4th of July, and only then because we were in New Jersey watching fireworks on the beach and it was cool and rainy. Since there is no dress code for the chronically unemployed, I've been rocking shorts 24-7 since then (except in the shower, Tobias.)

Aaaaaannnnnnnnnnd.....that's all I've got on pants today. Sorry, pants enthusiasts.

So what else is there to talk about? Rachel gets the award (deferred) for coming up with the best alternative name for the abortion pill in yesterday's comments: Uterscrub! There were several hilarious ideas, but this one just works in every way.

What? You didn't know it was a contest? It's always a contest, my friends. You should know that.

Obviously I haven't been struck over the head yet today with any good post ideas. Otherwise, you would know it because you'd be much more entertained by this point. Hey, at least I nixed the idea of taking pictures of my older pairs of shoes and telling a story about each one (Don't breathe that sigh of relief just yet; that one may be backburnered for NaBloPoMo.)

Don't forget to enjoy the VP debate tonight. I just hope Biden knows when to let up on the poor girl (and when to shut his prodigious yap.) And by "poor girl" I mean "wealthy governor of Alaska who knew exactly what she was getting into when she said 'yes' to McCain." And don't be fooled by what each of them is packing between their legs: Biden is the feminist, making women's issues one of his causes throughout his political career.

And here's a little drinking game for you: Do a shot for every minute that passes before the word "maverick" is uttered. I bet you won't even get drunk.

12 comments:

Melissa said...

It's me, the non-voter.

My husband would wear shorts all year round if he could!! Last night he was lightly complaining about it being cold. I looked at him in his shorts and short-sleeves and said, "Perhaps if you put some clothes on you wouldn't be cold."

Back to the voting conversation: I'd have to vote AGAINST everyone which means I'd be doing the same thing my husband is doing....voting for him. Honestly, I wouldn't even trust my husband to run the country. I've seen what he does...I live with him...once he shut his own head in a kitchen cabinet. It was pretty darn funny. He's so silly.

~Peaches~
Melissa

JustinS said...

I got the the Tobias part and couldn't concentrate on the rest.

Heheheh never-nude...

The Dutchess of Kickball said...

Dude, is it pants day? I posted about pants today too!

em said...

I love Tobias. Crying in the shower. Haha.

nancypearlwannabe said...

I'm almost glad that I will have to miss the debate by going to my book club. Then again, a Palin-bashing might improve my mood lately.

Noelle said...

I think I wore shorts once or twice this summer. Man, that was a hot day.

Courtney said...

That's not a very good drinking game. I'm thinking a shot every time Palin says, "I'll hafta get back to ya" may be better.

Stefanie said...

In Minnesota, it's been pants weather for a few weeks now. I did, however, put on socks today for the first time since May. I miss my sandals already. :-(

Also, have you seen this yet? It could totally be adapted for a drinking game as well.
http://www.palinbingo.com/

Aaron said...

Pants-based humor is always funny.

Also: don't make fun of never-nudes. There's literally dozens of us.

Julie said...

You're also wearing pants in the new photo posted to the right of this column. Coincidence?

The Modern Gal said...

As I was sitting at football practice today, I was noticing that none of the coaches make the shorts-to-pants transition. They just make the short-sleeved Ts-to-long-sleeved-to-hoodie transition. Maybe you could try that?

Jacob said...

You really do seem to be disturbingly obsessed with wearing pants. Your "i am" blurb mentions it (and I think there was another version that was worded differently but still mentioned your wearing pants not too long ago) and I know this can't be the first post you've mentioned pants.