Saturday, June 5, 2010

Stop. This. Now.

Seriously. Enough with the word(period) word(period) word(period) bullcrap. It's done. And I'm sure I've just offended someone, because I think it's that sort of cutesy syntax that starts with bloggers and I know we've all done it or are still doing it. But enough already. It wasn't all that clever the first time and now it's all over billboards and magazine ads. I even saw it used in the middle of a direct quote in Sports Illustrated today. I assume the guy being quoted just slowed down his speech for emphasis, but lately we've been throwing periods around like we all have a good friend who owns a punctuation factory and he's got a warehouse full of periods he needs to unload.

The unfortunate truth, however, is that punctuation marks are unlimited in supply, so it's up to us to show some restraint. Give the period a rest. Please.

Also, if anyone has a dependable (read: Mac) laptop they're trying to get rid of, let me know. I'm not spending another dime getting this Compaq fixed and I'm sure not buying another. It has once again decided to disavow all knowledge of its own wireless capability and I'm considering that the last straw. And that's also why I haven't been around the internet much lately.

9 comments:

Courtney said...

Someone's. Crabby. :)

Noelle said...

Your throwing down of the gauntlet makes it really hard not to comment in extra-period speak.

I have a new PC I'm trying to get rid of, but I can't guarantee that it will make your life any easier.

Julie said...

Stop projecting your internet hatred onto the period.

The Modern Gal said...

What the rest of them said.

You know what's funny? When I write that way, I totally think it's great and readable and funny. When I read it in other people's writing, I can't process it. I can't understand what they're trying to say, and then I get irritated.

I guess I'll cease and desist.

nancypearlwannabe said...

Noted. I will cease will all unnecessary punctuation from here on out. I think I might be okay with periods, but might overuse commas.

Anonymous said...

..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

r.e.w.o.t.h.g.i.h.

Chris said...

You know what else I'm sick of? Radio and TV ads using those unnaturally deep-voiced narrators to read their attempt at clever, dry-witted ad copy. Budweiser's Real Men of Genius campaign was kind of funny at first (several years ago), but now every other commercial I see or hear attempts to rip off the concept. Now it's just annoying.

Jacob said...

So are you opposed to the verbal pauses that the periods are meant to represent as well or just the use of periods there. I'm assuming you don't like people talking that way either because otherwise I can't figure out how you'd expect people to use that rhythm in their writing. After all, what's the point of punctuation if not to convey the verbal rhythms that help convey meaning?

Aaron said...

All well and good, my friend, but you're making it really, really hard to transcribe classic Star Trek episodes. There are periods in the middle of Shatner's sentences. I'm just saying.