Thursday, April 3, 2008

Deez my hos, y'all

Okay, not really. But I'm going to have to do some pimpin' here today and that's how the hierarchy works. So here are a couple of fishnet-wearing, chain-smoking, track-marked hotties for your ogling and purchasing pleasure.

- First up: CYOB, or as the slightly less hip call it, Choose Your Own Blogventure. Masterminded by the indefatigable NPW, CYOB is exactly what it sounds like: a storyline controlled by you that spans the blogosphere. It will begin at her site and from there will go wherever you steer. If you're lucky and you choose wisely, your course will bring you right through the Waitress for my hugely hilarious and heart-wrenching 500-word section. So don't be confused when you come here tomorrow and there is a strange bit of nonsensical fiction with no beginning and no end and some links to blogs you may not be familiar with. Start at Musings of a Semi-Coherent Mind (see sidebar) and enjoy the experiment. It should be up and running by 10 a.m. tomorrow.

-Second up: I got my first blog prize in the mail this week! It was also the first contact I've ever had with someone on the internet aside from typed words on this glowing screen. And if free stuff doesn't earn a person some solid pimpin', what will? Allie at Allie's Answers (again, see sidebar; I can't put up links from my work computer) sent me a copy of the book Green Chic simply for commenting on the appropriate posts. I didn't even realize I had entered the contest! Democracy in action, or something. Anywho, it's a book clearly geared towards hip and happenin' environmentalists of the female persuasion, but androgyny is my middle name, so I'm giving it a read. When Courtney (if she's interested) and I are through with it, I think it might be a good idea to hold my own contest and pass the book, which is chock full of great ideas for living a greener life, on to someone else. Recycling, right?

(Since the bloggers mentioned above happen to be female, I hope everyone understands that the prostitute analogy was purely an offshoot of my shameless "pimping" and not intended to impugn the upstanding characters of either Allie or NPW.)

-Last whore of the day: Myself, specifically yesterday's embarassing stick-with-the-herd movie quiz post. Noelle wondered when this meme would finally die, and I agree it's totally lame to begin with, but I don't want blood on my hands, so it will have to be put out of its misery elsewhere. I seem to have failed in my goal to make this quiz accessible to the masses and for that I apologize. I thought it was easier than it really was, but as a group, you guys did get most of them. Answers posted below.

11 comments:

Allie said...

I did not feel at all impugned. You know, 'cause I'm cool like that.

I love that you're going to pass the book on when you're done. Perfect!

And, I think it's hysterical that you didn't even know you'd entered the contest.

Anonymous said...

Man, work craziness has me mostly off the internet for two days, and I miss a movie quiz! Bah, I say!

Unknown said...

pimpin ain't easy.

shelleycoughlin said...

I didn't even know I had a pimp. I'm honored. Although, seeing as how I will earn a grand total of $0.00 for all my CYOB work, you may want to reconsider your title.

Also, go me! I got a couple of your movies, even though they were hard as hell. How did I miss Dead Poet's Society?!

Anonymous said...

Yay! I am excited for tomorrow.

Aaron said...

Ah, crap, I always miss the fun stuff. And I can safely say I would have gotten at least half of those quotes. Swear.

You speak the pimp language well. Perhaps there will be a hustler with your name in "Beej for Hire".

Anonymous said...

I was watching Boyz in the Hood last night, and I thought about bringing back the meme from the dead but using only black movies, just to point out how white everyone is. But then I couldn't think of a way to do that without using the "n" word a lot. So I'm probably going to let it die.

Not that I hate the meme itself, but I always arrive at them too late to answer anything with certainty. I saw Brain Candy in the theatres, and I have the soundtrack, but I can't quote any of it. Darnit.

Anonymous said...

I'm offended. Totally. Not. Funny.

The Modern Gal said...

'androgyny is my middle name'

for some reason i found that really, really funny.

Mickey said...

allie- You are cool like that.

chris- But I'm worth every penny.

beej- No excuses.

surviving myself- Ain't that the truth.

npw- The honor's all mine. Just give me my money.

em- It should be interesting.

aaron- I believe you would have. And my name would actually work really well for a pimp, I think. I'd be honored.

noelle- You mean Boyz -n- Tha Hood. White girl.

kiala- AIDS.

modern gal- I'm incredibly hilarious.

Julie said...

I didn't like Brain Candy but love KITH otherwise. They're coming to the Cobb Energy Performing Arts Center in May and I'm considering shelling out the $50 to see them.

And your whoring is news to no one.